When I was a photographer

    And all the lessons it taught me.

Let me tell you a story.

A long time ago, well in internet years it was a long time ago, I had a wedding and portrait photography business. Chelsea Lynn Photography. I started with a Canon Rebel xti with the kit lens and a lot of big dreams. I had just graduated college with a degree in elementary education and I had zero desire to teach, more on that story in another post. I was working as a dental assistant while John was working as a youth minister and and finishing up his Master’s degree. I knew dentistry was definitely not the field I wanted to be in either, and this dream of starting a photography business just embedded itself into my heart deeper and deeper. So John bought me a camera with money we definitely did not have, I bought books on exposure and read the camera manual cover to cover. I took a photography workshop with a local photographer and practiced action shots on my friend’s dog running through the backyard. My college roommate’s family paid me to take their family pictures and boom-I was in business. I was scared the whole time and worked with a pit in my stomach most of the time. I bought a used macbook from a random fellow on Craigslist and taught myself photoshop the same way I learned my camera, which involved a lot of reading and a lot of frustrating nights in front of a computer. I posted on my photography blog all of the pictures I was taking, and I was so proud of them at the time. In retrospect, the pictures are not at all stellar but it absolutely shows how much I practiced and how hard I worked. If you’re curious and want go stalk it, the address is https://chelsealynnphotography.blogspot.com  Make sure you go back to the earliest posts. I started out calling it Chelsea and Main, lol.

I call this one: “I can use photoshop yes I can, I can use photoshop how about you?!”

I’m so glad I started all those years ago.

My photography story has more twists and turns that maybe I’ll share one day but here is the simple fact. As i progressed in my photography I never could shake the feeling of fear every time I put myself out there. I never felt 100% confident in my abilities. So when I had Rylynn in 2012, I was glad I had a really good reason to stop. Photography took a huge backseat as the duties of motherhood and the diagnosis of hip dysplasia really enveloped my life.

The best part is, God wastes nothing. All of those years spent practicing, reading, learning, traveling, they taught me great things about myself.

Here’s what I know now.

1. I’m never going to stop feeling scared to do something new for the first time. My wired for safety brain just won’t allow that. But I CAN do things scared. I can do anything I want, as along as I lean into the fear and am not surprised by it. Do it scared. It’s that simple.

2. I still love photography, I love taking pictures, and I love documenting all the moments that make up a lifetime. It’s a valuable skill and I wouldn’t trade those years hauling a camera around for anything.

So what’s next? Well, that’s where it gets exciting. Because there’s a million possibilities for that. You can be sure I’ll be scared and doing it anyway and  taking lots of pictures along the way!

See how you can get better when you don’t give up?